Your worst nightmare


This is a sobering piece for me to attempt to write today. Yesterday my Husband and I attended a wake for a very young person. A young man who died tragically, unexpectedly and altogether way too young. He was in college, loving life, thinking of all the possibilities out there for him, and now he is gone.

I know many of you will have seen the story on the news about the young man who died while taping the Notre Dame football practice, he is this young man.

I did not have the privilege of knowing this young man. We did, however, know his father when we were not much younger than this young man was. My husband knew his father well while he was in grade school and high school, and I got to meet him as the girlfriend of the friend. Much time has passed since then, people don't see each other much, but the connection alone, was reason enough to go pay our respects. We have children near the same age, and our hearts are breaking for this family.

We arrived at the funeral home and waited for 3 hours to pay our respects to his parents. After we did, there were still people waiting in line, probably for another 3 hours,such was the enormous outpouring of support from people who were and are somehow connected to this family. A family that now has changed.

As my husband and I drove back home, we were quiet at first, and then sighed. What a terrible waste. Although we could attempt to imagine the horrific pain that family is in, I am sure we have no idea what is actually going on. We took that moment to call each of our children and tell them how much we love them. How much they matter to us.

I spend a lot of time on this blog writing about what I think matters most in the process of being a good parent. I am truly passionate about parenting and all that makes someone a good parent. I think about what I want to say. I hope to try and make a difference in people's minds as they make the choices and decisions involved with raising children. Today, I am going to say what truly matters most of all.....LOVE!

We spend time thinking about all the nuances of daily family life. The shopping, the cooking, the laundry, the running around, the balancing of career and family, the money we spend and make, yet I would bet my whole life on the fact that today, November 1st 2010, the family that just lost their son, doesn't care one bit about any of that stuff.

What matters is that we take the time to love. To let our children always know they are loved. To make the phone call to someone away at college, to hug your child who is close, to spend some extra time at dinner telling your kids what special people they are, and that you love them more than you can find words to express.

Love, that is all that matters. Not accomplishments, not grades, not sports, not popularity; nothing except love.

Love your children, and never ever pass up a chance to tell them that.
Go find your kids, big and small, and love them.

Until next time,